“Remy the Rat: Tiny Tenant, Major Menace”
All Remy wanted was a warm place to crash. Something cozy, safe, maybe with a few crumbs under the couch. So when he found a nice, quiet attic in the suburbs, he thought he’d struck gold.
Unfortunately, Remy also had a bit of a… chewing problem.
First, it was the insulation. Soft, fluffy, and perfect for nesting. Then it was the wood beams — what can he say? He liked the texture. But the real trouble started when Remy discovered the electrical wires.
Look, he didn’t mean to gnaw through them. It was just one little nibble. Okay, maybe several. But the sparks! The sizzle! The faint smell of something burning! That was new.
And then — fwoosh — the attic lit up like a birthday cake. Remy barely escaped with his tail unsinged. The humans? Let’s just say their attic’s now open-air.
Lesson learned? Well… almost?
You’d think Remy would take this as a sign to retire. Maybe settle down in the woods. But no. He packed up his singed nest fluff and moved on — this time to a crawlspace under a mobile home. Fewer wires, less drama, and a leaky pipe to sip from. What could go wrong?
Plenty.
A few weeks in, Remy decided the PVC pipe was just asking to be chewed. Just a little taste. Next thing you know, the kitchen flooded, mold grew like it was on steroids, and the homeowner’s repair bill had enough zeroes to make a grown man cry.
So now Remy’s on the run again. His Yelp rating as a tenant? Rock bottom. His resume? Firestarter, plumber’s nightmare, insulation hoarder.
But hey — he’s still just looking for a place to call home.